The Dark Knight - Another Review
To begin with, I should admit that I’m both a huge fan of the Batman comic and not in any way a fan of the last Batman movie, which probably isn’t a great basis on which to review this film, but nevertheless I was stupidly excited about seeing The Dark Knight. And whilst I found the first incarnation of this new, excitingly-gloomy version of the franchise a massive chore - it should have been called Batman Begins In About 90 Minutes Time- I was cheered by the knowledge that at least having dispensed with the obligatory ‘who is this Batman, and where did he come from?’ characterisation rubbish, that this instalment could get down to business and get on with being exciting and Batman-y. Sadly, my crest could not be more fallen. In its defence, The Dark Knight has perfect scoring, is beautifully, shot, impeccably cast, and has a brilliantly comic- book representation of both the Batman and of Gotham, but its- well- crucially flawed, really. The big problem is Batman. He’s just no good.
To explain, firstly he’s too gadgety. What’s really admirable and unique and attractive about Batman is that he’s just a man- albeit a slightly odd one with a lot of cash at his disposal- but this version of the Batman isn’t so much hard, as just hardware. In The Dark Knight, he seems to have a gadget for every eventuality, removing his need for cunning or ability, and as such he becomes less attractive as a hero. Seriously, I was waiting for the shark repelling bat spray.
Moreover, if he’s going to have gadgets, why not just have bloody guns? They do a pretty good job of being discouraging for everyone else. And yes, I know he doesn’t do killing- more of that later - but he could always shoot them in the legs or something, couldn’t he? It can be no worse than all the broken limbs etc he hands out. Batman should be an ordinary man, trained to levels unknown but not unobtainable by other men (thus allowing equally nails but yet strangely conflicted about fatalistic methods foes to be a threat) and never just a moving technology showcase. This Batman is more inspector gadget than Batman, and whilst I like a cool toy more than most grown ups, the stuff in this movie is a step too far. Or, they should at least make him nails, too. And he’s sort of not. More of that later too.
Secondly, it’s actually too bloody dark. Not in the dramatic sense, just in the visibility sense. I know that Batman uses the dark to strike fear into his opponents and maximise the impact of his costume, but it’s no good if we can’t see what he’s bloody doing. There are several fight scenes where you hear him hitting people and them screaming, but we just can’t see him doing it. They can use this once or maybe twice in any Batmovie to demonstrate how he can be effective in an ineffectual environment, but as a viewer we need to see the bad guys getting punished – it’s part of the catharsis of having this slightly showy invisible avenger. Hiding his clever use of martial arts and sheer ability just gets tedious - they may as well as have replaced the fight scenes with screens that said ‘pow!’ ‘biff!’ and ‘ker-blammo!’. I want to see him hitting and kicking- it’s what I’ve paid my 8 quid for. But in The Dark Knight, I couldn’t see a damn thing.
Thirdly, and there’s just no getting around this, Christian bales Batman voice is stupid. All the way through I just kept thinking ‘why is he talking in that Coors Extra Light Beer voice?’ It’s distracting and annoying, and makes you miss a lot of what he’s saying for the slight wonderment of how he’s saying it. It’s not menacing either, it’s just silly. Seriously, say that last sentence again, but in your deepest voice. Now throw in your worst impression of a wrestling commentator. Does it sound scary? It doesn’t, does it? Now try and imagine using that voice to deliver lines like, ‘Jim, we’ve got to catch this Joker before he blows up the hospital’. It’s sort of wrong, and seems somehow a step too far. Surely the costume should do the scaring, and if it’s a disguising your identity thing, then cover up the rest of your face, oddball.
Fourthly, whilst I’m aware that Batman has this blurry line of morality in the comics, whereby he won’t kill anyone, this could not be more inappropriate on the big screen, most especially in a big, splashy, destruct-o-rama special such as The Dark Knight. You see, whilst he won’t kill the joker, he does kill seemingly millions of innocent people as the film depicts the wake of his pursuits around town. I usually don’t mind the suspension of disbelief on this aspect of movies - the A Team used to foreground this conceit beautifully by showing people climbing out of cars that have just flipped hundreds of times just rubbing their heads and looking mildly shaken up - but setting this as the moral bar in a film that goes out of its way to show realistic and moving destruction (and some of the clumsy 9/11 echoes used to create, heighten and realistically ground this reality are enough to make my skin actually crawl all the way back to the car, drive to Christopher Nolan’s house and hit him for pandering to the American market in such a crassly sentimental way) just doesn’t work.
In short, they can’t have it both ways, and here it just shows itself up to be what it really is: namely a device by which elongate the action, and endlessly extend the narrative and of course the franchise. And once you’ve seen this happen once, there seems to be little point in watching the rest of the movie. After all, what’s the worst that can happen? Almost nothing, that’s what, unless someone dies of natural causes, of in the case of this film, old age. Sorry, that’s clumsy of me, let me at least stick to the format I’ve set for myself.
The film is way too fcuking long. There, that’s better. All neat and tidy, like. And not only is it too long, but there’s too much plotting and machination for the viewer to handle or the plot to do equal justice too. Earlier weaker movies needed three of four foes to cover up a lack of plot- after all more bad guys equal more explosions- but in something like The Dark Knight, after a while all the other strands of plotting just become something you have to endure whilst you wait for the joker to come back on. And that’s the real problem with this film, the Joker. Oops, paragraph break first, then more words. Sorry.
This is undoubtedly the Joker’s film, it’s a stellar performance, truly. Really marvellous. But the bad part of this is that it shows up just how bad Christian Bale’s performance is. Well, that’s not fair really, he’s not terrible, it’s just that because everyone else is so perfectly cast (Aaron Eckhart and Gary Oldman as much as Heath Ledger, even with their smaller roles) and are so great at becoming their characters - with the obvious exception of that bloke from the Fast Show, of course - that Christian Bale seems to be the only one that’s acting. And on a number of levels. He’s not convincing as Batman, and he’s not convincing as Bruce Wayne either. Or really as an American, truth be told. And I usually really like him and his accents, too. But he’s definitely the weak link here, and it throws the rest of the movie into turmoil as he’s not likeable or enjoyable to watch.
Likewise, this version of Batman is just weak, as is the Bruce Wayne. They’re both equally dribbly, and both really need supporting and cosseting all the bloody time. Ooo its so hard, I have to make sacrifices and its soo hard. So what? That’s the choice you made, remember? It’s no good bleating about it now, just get on with it, and turn the grimness into grim determination. And here’s the thing that all good Batman depictions, erm, depict, the truth is that Bruce Wayne should only be acting as Bruce Wayne, and is Batman in reality. It’s what he is, not something he’s dressing up and doing - that’s what he does as Wayne. Yet here, he needs constant tutor-ledge, advice and direction, and seems genuinely more comfortable being the whiny yet confusingly smug Bruce Wayne. And they’re both equally tortured, miserable and ineffective and as a result there’s no contrast- not even a contrived contrast where Bruce pretends to be happy just to underline Batman’s unhappy destiny. And as such, he’s boring and a bit of a chore to watch. He makes me tired all over, and I got bored of looking at him and all his silly indestructo-non-hurty-toys.
Overall, it is well executed- without anybody being executed well, naturally, but, and I honestly can’t believe I’m going to write this down let alone think it – it’s just too much like a comic. It’s too dark and too over-wrought and it’s too bleeding long, normally things that make for a good comic, with each image wringing as much drama as possible out of minimalist patches of light against massive patches of dark (like Frank Millers Sin City comics, for example), but in a movie that just doesn’t work. I totally get that they want to divert themselves from the last few Batmovies and make it all serious, but there’s a limit - one of the main reasons the Joker character works so well here is that he’s got the only good lines in it, and he’s the only one allowed to entertain, which is sort of annoying in an entertainment medium. Really - why so serious? It adds very little, and detracts hugely.
I’m genuinely gutted. I love a good Batman film, but this inst it, mainly because it’s not a good film and its not a good Batman. I just wish they’d made it a Joker film instead, or even a Two-Face film, cos they really are/ were ace.
It’s a no from me, though as ever, I’m happy to be proved wrong. In the meantime, I’ll keep watching for the signal in the hope that a better bat comes along.
Tags: Batman, Christian Bale, Gary Oldman, Joker, The Dark Knight
