Sick list

Sit down and tell us what's wrong with you.

Re: Sick list

Post by DI Burnside @ Tue Nov 26, 2019 7:36 pm

Russell has just been told to shut the fcuk up Russell has.

A nurse was stood at the entrance to the bay for 10 minutes quite obviously so he could see to us all if need be. He walked out of sight for about 15 seconds and Russell whined “I think they’ve all gone home”.

My “Will you just shut the fcuk up” coincided nicely with the nurse returning to his post, he quite clearly struggled not to lol.
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Re: Sick list

Post by S1K @ Tue Nov 26, 2019 8:32 pm

Lol

You tell ‘im Dibs
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Re: Sick list

Post by DI Burnside @ Tue Nov 26, 2019 8:40 pm

The nurses are joining in. One just had to wheel the blood pressure machine past him and asked him to move his foot which was in the way. When he did she said ”Well done !” like you would to a kid that just did it’s first shit in a potty.
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Re: Sick list

Post by Damien Thorn @ Tue Nov 26, 2019 9:07 pm

When I was on the ward after falling over in the road last month, there was a SPECTACULARLY complainy young man in a separate room at the end. He spent all night every night shouting at the nurses for more pain medication or toast. I know this because I wasn't sleeping too well anyway.

All my other wardpals were quite stoic about their lot and nothing like as complainy as him - although in a lot of pain themselves for various reasons - but were nice and friendly and polite, yet frank in equal measure.

Such that at bed time the complainy bloke would often get shouts of "why don't you fcuking shut up mate?" from the others.

Or "leave it out pal, yeah? You fcuking prick".
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Re: Sick list

Post by Pigeon @ Tue Nov 26, 2019 11:17 pm

DI Burnside wrote:The nurses are joining in. One just had to wheel the blood pressure machine past him and asked him to move his foot which was in the way. When he did she said "Well done !" like you would to a kid that just did it's first shit in a potty.


I am now imagining that he gets off the empty potty and toddles round the ward with no kecks on, stopping occasionally to do a piss or a shit on the floor and congratulate himself each time in an imitation of the nurse. (Because this is what my sister did when she was of that age.)
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Re: Sick list

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Nov 27, 2019 12:36 am

They’ve had to move me to a different bay just now, I needed one with a plumbed in O2 supply as my bottle was running out.

There’s some poor sod in here who’s having conversations with imaginary people and being surprised by whatever he’s hearing. He’s also periodically letting off quite colossal farts which really should get a round of applause.
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Re: Sick list

Post by Pigeon @ Wed Nov 27, 2019 5:21 am

Ask him who's going to win the election.
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Re: Sick list

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Nov 27, 2019 12:02 pm

Spooky. I’ve just realised I'm in the bed next to the one I was in after my craniotomy !
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Re: Sick list

Post by Dirk @ Wed Nov 27, 2019 2:59 pm

Pigeon wrote:Ask him who's going to win the election.

Has to be more realistic than Swinson saying it could be her
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Re: Sick list

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 12:24 pm

DI Burnside wrote:Went to see our friend again tonight, took some meals up for them so they don’t have to think about cooking for a few nights. She’s looking really well, her red blood cells and platelets are right up, from being hours away from it being irreversible to within normal range ! Bone marrow tests on Monday and if that looks ok then it’s 1 more round of chemo and then just monitoring. Nobody is counting chickens but it’s looking a whole lot better for them.


She’s only gone and beaten it !

Her blood and bone marrow are clear, they’re going to do another round of chemo and possibly a bone marrow transplant to reduce the chance of it happening again, but for now she’s kicked it into touch. Best Xmas present ever.
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Re: Sick list

Post by Clown Ice Skater #4 @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 12:26 pm

This post intentionally left blank.
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Re: Sick list

Post by span @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 12:56 pm

DI Burnside wrote:
DI Burnside wrote:Went to see our friend again tonight, took some meals up for them so they don’t have to think about cooking for a few nights. She’s looking really well, her red blood cells and platelets are right up, from being hours away from it being irreversible to within normal range ! Bone marrow tests on Monday and if that looks ok then it’s 1 more round of chemo and then just monitoring. Nobody is counting chickens but it’s looking a whole lot better for them.


She’s only gone and beaten it !

Her blood and bone marrow are clear, they’re going to do another round of chemo and possibly a bone marrow transplant to reduce the chance of it happening again, but for now she’s kicked it into touch. Best Xmas present ever.

That's wonderful news, Dibs!! Feel genuinely cheered to hear it, I hope they can have a relaxed Christmas.
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Re: Sick list

Post by Damien Thorn @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 1:11 pm

Amazing!
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Re: Sick list

Post by Turntable @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 1:20 pm

DI Burnside wrote:
DI Burnside wrote:Went to see our friend again tonight, took some meals up for them so they don’t have to think about cooking for a few nights. She’s looking really well, her red blood cells and platelets are right up, from being hours away from it being irreversible to within normal range ! Bone marrow tests on Monday and if that looks ok then it’s 1 more round of chemo and then just monitoring. Nobody is counting chickens but it’s looking a whole lot better for them.


She’s only gone and beaten it !

Her blood and bone marrow are clear, they’re going to do another round of chemo and possibly a bone marrow transplant to reduce the chance of it happening again, but for now she’s kicked it into touch. Best Xmas present ever.


Fantastic news. I don't know this woman at all and yet I genuinely felt good hearing it.
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Re: Sick list

Post by minornut @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 2:41 pm

That’s amazing news Dibs.

People beating the big C always makes for good news.


I’m crossing my fingers for the same result for a friend’s son who has just finished his last round of chemo
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Re: Sick list

Post by DI Burnside @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 3:23 pm

Thanks all, I am over the moon about it.
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Re: Sick list

Post by Firkin @ Wed Dec 04, 2019 4:13 pm

That's amazing news Dibs.

My Uncle unfortunately died of Bowel Cancer a few weeks ago, we have his funeral just before Christmas. What a horrid time of year for such a thing.

I suppose thankfully he never married or had children so my Dad and his siblings are the closest family members he had but we never really saw much of him. It's only in the last few months of speaking to my Dad that I realised he must have had something like Asperger's like Master F. He was a very clever and talented man but his social skills were appalling. It appears he lived in the same flat in a Housing Association place for the last 20 years but knew none of the other residents in the building which was quite large because he didn't wish to socialise with people. Occasionally he would come and visit us but he fell out with his sister some years ago last time he saw her and didn't really get on with my Dad so I think it must have been a few years since I saw him. I now really regret that I didn't make more of an effort to see him but if he was anything like my son you cannot force someone to be social if they don't have it in them - I'm not the most outward of people in this respect either. I also didn't know he was so ill - I knew he had cancer but the last I heard he had had an op and all was looking fairly good. Next thing he was in hospital and my Dad's brother got a call to say he wouldn't last the night and died alone early the next morning. I'm struggling with the fact he died alone and no one was with him because the message was never passed around family that he was in the final hours. He must have felt so unloved :(
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Re: Sick list

Post by Greg66 @ Mon Mar 02, 2020 5:07 pm

Ok, so I’d be the first to admit that this doesn’t quite rank with beating cancer, but I think you will all agree that, in fact, it’s right up there with beating cancer.

I stubbed my toe on Sunday morning.

I actually slammed it into the face of a wooden step so hard that I hard trouble breathing for a few minutes.

It hurt, a lot. And it still hurt this morning. And it looks like this.

2EFE44DF-8E98-4023-9C9C-EA2B72E10048.jpeg
Can you tell which one I hurt?
2EFE44DF-8E98-4023-9C9C-EA2B72E10048.jpeg (103.03 KiB) Viewed 774 times


I think I might be one of the first people to die of a stubbed toe.
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Re: Sick list

Post by CJ+ @ Mon Mar 02, 2020 5:21 pm

That's broken as fcuk.

I did something similar. I manned up, of course, because Northern, and left it. I now have a toe that's at a jaunty angle compared to the rest.

Also your toenails. Cut them, you minger.
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Re: Sick list

Post by thekungfury @ Mon Mar 02, 2020 7:28 pm

The most horrific foot I’ve seen in, well, possibly ever. Are you a shaved hobbit you freak?
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Re: Sick list

Post by Greg66 @ Mon Mar 02, 2020 11:58 pm

That is a foot to make a woman swoon.

And I have another one just like it.

More or less.
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Re: Sick list

Post by S1K @ Tue Mar 03, 2020 1:10 am

Do you swoop down from the sky to catch rabbits and other small mammals with those talons?
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Re: Sick list

Post by HappyGoLucky @ Tue Mar 03, 2020 3:09 am

Greg66 wrote:
I think I might be one of the first people to die of a stubbed toe.

Can I have the Aston if you do?

Can't believe the owner of such a foot could have an Aston, maybe it's another Micheal Gould type fantasist we've got here?
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Re: Sick list

Post by Il Duce @ Tue Mar 03, 2020 9:09 am

Feck! It looks like it belongs to a tramp. Why is it dirty? Do you live outside?
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Re: Sick list

Post by Pigeon @ Tue Mar 03, 2020 4:38 pm

I dropped a breadboard on my toe once. Edge on, bare feet. It fcuking hurt, and it was bloody great.

Because it meant the school did not expect me to spend the entirety of a shitty November weekend squelching around the muddy countryside in the rain and cold, sleeping in a soggy tent in the middle of the mud and being pissed on in the night by a contingent of older lads self-selected for being cnuts who liked to prove how mature and grown up they were by sneaking off to the pub and then coming back drunk and pissing on people. I don't mean it got me out of doing it; I fully intended to skive it anyway on the basis that there was nothing they could possibly do to me by way of punishment that would be anywhere near as horrible as doing the trip. But the lucky chance of fcuking my foot meant that they didn't consider my absence to be punishable anyway.
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Re: Sick list

Post by deev @ Wed Mar 04, 2020 12:00 am

Tape it to the one next to it. Looks pretty broken to me (having had several broken toes). Also cut your toe nails, jesus!
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Re: Sick list

Post by Deuteronomy @ Fri Mar 06, 2020 12:16 pm

Bloody hell Greggers, your foot looks like it belongs to Mumm-Ra you horrid beast.
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Re: Sick list

Post by manfromdelmonte @ Fri Mar 06, 2020 3:43 pm

Did someone put your little-toe on sideways?
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Re: Sick list

Post by Greg66 @ Wed Mar 18, 2020 8:50 pm

I’m pleased to say it’s much better now.

I’ve booked a nail session session for next month. Wouldn’t want them tapping on the floor!
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Re: Sick list

Post by minornut @ Mon May 11, 2020 3:58 pm

This morning I had to go the hospital in Sheffield to have my finger looked at after an accident with a hedge trimmer on Saturday (local A&E couldn't fix it).
I'll be going back tomorrow to have the tendon repaired and then a cast put on to stop me snapping it by straightening my fingers.

(pictures are available for the non-squeamish)
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